A/N: kinda sorta sad and involves self harming! no like? NO READ!
"Go to Hell!"
These were the constant insults that invaded your mind every day. You don't know why everyone picked on you. Perhaps they found it fun to see you in pain. The sadistic glow in their eyes when they push you to the ground was enough to know they didn't care.
"Hey loser! Watch where you're going!" sneered a girl with blonde hair. She shoved passed you and moved towards her group of friends. They all looked at you, whispered, and laughed.
You continued walking to history class and took your usually seat in the front row. As you begun flipping through your notes, you were flicked in the back of the head. You turned around to see Alfred Jones. Oh how you loathed him. He was the first person to start picking on you. He made everyone else too. His wheat blonde hair and bright blue eyes make you think he is welcoming. But they are lies.
"Morning fatty!" he shouted extra loud. You turned around in your chair and faced the front.
Alfred growled in irritation. He grabbed a fistful of your (h/l) (h/c) hair. "Hey! I'm talking to you!"
You hissed in pain. "Let go!" you said in a small voice.
Alfred laughed. "Why should I? It's not like your hair is anything special." Alfred's friends snickered.
You were about to say something when you teacher strolled through the door. Alfred instantly let go your hair and acted as though nothing happened.
The lesson was boring enough. As you wrote down your notes you rubbed your wrist tenderly. Your yesterdays cuts had a dull ache to them as the many other had before.
You were writing a quick paper on the history of someone you know.
"Okay class, who wants to read their paper?" your teacher asked scanning the room.
"I'll go!" Alfred said. Everyone but you turned to face him. He cleared his throat and smirked. "This is the history of the day I met _______." You sat in silent shock as he continued. "As soon as I first layed my eyes on ______, I knew she was a loser." Here we go. "I could tell by her stupidity and boring attitiude that no one would like her. It was grade 5 when we met. She had to be the biggest nerd I had ever layed eyes on. With her geeky square glasses and frizzy hair." his speech about you continued on for a while. You could feel yourself getting close to tears. "______ knows she is useless and pathetic and we all know it too-" You sprang up and slapped him. Everyone who was snickering immediately stopped and stared in awe at what you just did.
"You think I'm a loser?" you started. "That I'm useless and pathetic. You know why I'm like that?" you snarled, voice getting louder. "Because of you. All of you. Ever since I could remember, all any of you have ever done was tell me how I'm stupid, a loser or ugly. Why am I like that? Because you people make me into that!" you shouted now addressing the entire class. You glared back to Alfred. His baby blue eyes filled with shock. "What did I ever do to you?" you walked a little closer to him and snapped. "Well?! Tell me!" you cried.
Alfred stuttered in response.
"That's what I thought." you said calmly. "Fuck you Alfred Jones." and you went towards the door.
"Where are you going young lady?!" huffed your teacher.
You looked at her sadly with tears in her eyes. "According to you and everyone else, straight down to Hell."
And with your final remark, you slammed the door to the classroom shut and ran home.
Everyone in the room was silent.
"Yo Al," said my friend Mathias from behind. "I think you went a little too far this time."
Some of my other friends nodded.
"It's _____ we're talking about, she'll be fine." I said trying to brush it off. In truth I knew I went too far. _____ had never lashed out at anyone before. Had my words really affected her?
The bell rang signalling that second period would soon start. So I grabbed my books and went to my next class.
______ wasn't there for any of her other classes. I would know, I'm in all of them.
But I'm sure she is fine. ______ is tough! She was always the one to stick up for others.
'Because of you.'
Her sweet voice rang in my head. Yeah that's right, I think her voice is sweet.
But never mind that. I'm sure she is fine.
---Time Skip 3 Weeks later-----
I'm worried about her.
She hasn't come to school for 3 weeks now. No one has been able to contact her.
I decided that I would go and see her after school. Hopefully I would be able to find her.
---Time Skip AGAIN------
"Alfred you bloody git! Slow down!" shouted my older brother Arthur as I raced through the parking lot to my red Volvo. "Where are you going?"
"I have to go and fix something I broke." I stated simply and sadly.
"So you're going to go see ______?" he said to clarify.
I blinked. "How did you know?"
" 'I have to go fix something I broke.' " he said repeating me. "You didn't just break her Alfred, you destroyed her." I knew ________ and Arthur were friendly towards each other, he was probably the only friend she had. "Do you understand how much your words affect her Alfred? How much pain you caused her over the years? But to embarrass her like that was uncalled for." His green eyes bored into me as he spoke. "You should be ashamed." he turned and left without another word.
You laid there. Hoping and wishing for death to strike you. Sadly, the Grim Reaper must have been on holidays, for you are still breathing.
You dropped out of school. Why should you go back to the place that causes you pain right?
Sighing with sadness, you sluggishly made your way down the stairs to feed your cat, Itacat.
He let out his strange "Ve~"'s as you scooped some pasta into his dish. You didn't have any yourself in worry you would get fat.
The cuts on your wrists increased greatly. They roamed up your arms and across your stomach. Who would care though right? Your parents had abandoned you when you were five and you had no family contact. Maybe your cat would care, but you doubted that as well.
You slowly made your way into your bathroom and went towards the sink. Your pale, bony fingers wrapped around the medicine cabinet drawer. You felt around until you found your diet pills. Opening the container, you shoved two of the pink capsules in your mouth and downed them with some water. You swallowed harshly and sighed, looking back down at your pills then looking at yourself in the mirror.
In the mirror, you saw yourself they way no girl wants to see themselves. In fear of what you saw was true, you reopened the bottle of medicine and shoved two more pills in your mouth.
In reality, you had lost so much weight from not eating and the pills you were majority bone. Your pale (s/c) skin stretched over your bones. You were a walking skeleton.
The words the bullies said to you swarmed in your head.
They tore through you. You felt large tears roll down your icy cheeks as you grabbed the scissors from the same drawer. You began running the sharp edge along your soft skin. You hissed in pain and whipped the object across the room. You curled into a ball and pressed your face into your knees.
There was a frantic knocking at the door.
"_______! ______! Open up!" called a horribly familiar voice.
I sobbed softly as he continued to hit my door.
"_____! Please open the door! Don't make me have to kick this thing down!"
You heard the door crack slightly until it nearly blew off the hinges.
You curled even tighter. "P-please, just leave." your said hoarsely. You slowly stood and made your way to the door where Alfred stood. Weak and covered in fresh and dried blood, he still thought you looked beautiful.
He stared at you. He saw the new and old cuts that littered your body. How thin had you gotten since that day. Your cheeks looked sunken in. A hollow body, for a hollow heart.
"_-____?!" he said coming closer to you. His hand rose toward you and you flinched back. "Did...did I do this to you?" tears glistened in his baby blue eyes.
You looked at him smugly. "And why would you care? It's not like you thought about it when you were hurting me." You walked toward him and shoved you wrist in his face. He could only stare at the jagged scars and dried blood. "You did this to me. Look at what you caused!" his eye averted you."LOOK AT ME!" you screamed. He winced and looked, his eyes widening .
"_______....." he started, but you cut him off.
"Are you satisfied? Is this what you wanted to see? Do you understand how much it hurt to even come to school? Do you even know how it feels to be afraid to enter your classroom without being terrorized by others? Well, DO YOU?!" he rushed into you with such force it nearly knocked you over. He wrapped his arms around you and pressed his face in your hair. You could feel sobs racking through his body. He leaned your head up and slammed his mouth onto yours in a bruising kiss. Your body was too stunned to react. He pulled away and looked into his teary eyes.
"I'm so sorry...______...so sorry." You stared at him in shock. His arms tightened around your shaking frame. "I never meant to hurt you so bad. I never did honest. The hero isn't supposed to hurt others. Please, will you forgive me? I love you."
The sincerity in his voice was heart breaking. Did he really mean it? Did he love you? You stared at him. Large (e/c) eyes doused in a layer of tears.
"I forgive you."
His face brightened up at your saying.
"But," you stated removing yourself from him. "I can never forget what you did to me Alfred. And I never will." You looked at him sternly. "If you really do love me like you say you do, you need to prove it."
Alfred blinked quickly in shock, then smirked.